Friday, May 25, 2012

My future

Well, I was talking to my sister in Christ on the computer, who by the way, is happily married with a beautiful foster child! Basically what I want out of life. Her name is Robin. I said to Robin, because she is about ten year older than me, you give me hope because you didn't get married until you were thirty - six. Robin said it happened because she gave her future completely over to God. I thought, wow, what a wonderful concept. I wanted that! I wanted to completely trust God with what comes next. After all my plans ten years ago for my life are not what they turned out to be, there are way better than anything I could have dreamed!

So you know what I did? I started praying for the courage to put my future in God's hands. It was scary. I think as humans, we always have to have some sort of plan so I knew I couldn't just pray, "God I put my future in Your Hands." I knew I would be lying and not let go. Then I went to a Charismatic healing mass and had them pray over me to have courage to give my future over to God's hands. And you know what? When I rested in the spirit, I felt a feeling of God asking me what I wanted. What do I truly want! I couldn't believe it. God was asking me! I told God in my heart, where He lives, that I wanted to travel all around the world and make a difference in people's lives. But I asked how am I going to do that. The answer came simply in my head. Write a book!

Write a book! I am poet, I have no patience for books. But you know what. I've getting on my computer and sitting for an hour a day and words just pour out! I don't know where they come from. Somewhere deep inside of me. Always as writer I believe in the "muse" of the Universe. But this is crazy I am writing like nuts! 

And you know what? I went to another healing mass and I asked the prayer team to pray to help me write this book, find the right audience, and to get a good publisher. It's going to be a Christian book by the way. And the gentlemen in the group actually said, "Bless Amanda as she writes books." That's right he said BOOKS plural, not book singular. I was blown away. God wants ME to write books.

Well, my blogging buddies. I tell you how the book comes out. Maybe it's just therapy for me. Maybe a few people will read it. But I tell you one thing. I AM going to finish this book. I want to see where this is going to go.


  1. Oh Manda....what an excellent choice. I wish you only the best in your writing a book. But at the same time you new enthusiasm sounds a bit manic. Are you sleeping okay? I don't want you feel discouraged by me asking that. Just want you to be healthy and I do hope God gives you the strength to write many books and hopefully publish them.

    1. Really? A bit Manic? I do have bipolar tendecies. That's how come I know about Lamitcal! I am sleeping alright, though. Can you sleep well and still be manic? I am always worried about being manic. It's part of my touch of my Mom's OCD. When I was going through my second schizophernic break, I thought I was being manic. But they did the whole ink blot, build me house with blocks test, mostly because my Mom was afarid I had a brain tumor and not a mental illness. Anyone it came back I had schizophernia!

      Anyway, I just value your opinion and am taking it into consideration!

      Hugs with blessings,

  2. Hi Manda...I wish you a beautiful week